Tuesday, September 16, 2014

To The Wallflowers

(Image from Google)

   You're my favorite kind of person.

   Seriously. 

   You think no one notices you when you stand off to the side, or how you don't speak often, or how you don't come to every social gathering. You're shy. Introverted. Maybe even a little bit afraid. 

   You've heard it all before. You know exactly what I'm talking about. 
   "Why don't you talk more?"
   "Why do you sit alone?"
   "Are you depressed?"
   "Talking isn't that hard."
   And I won't even start on the countless jokes and snarky comments people probably make about you. You've heard every single one. People think they're being funny or original, but they aren't. They're being insensitive and being a copy.  I'm so sorry for those people. I'm sorry that they don't understand.

   I know how they all see you. They think of some sad person who hates humanity and is utterly heartless and just would rather be alone; and maybe there are times you start to believe those things for yourself. But I see you as so much more. You're so beautiful. You have such a big heart and you feel everything so deeply. You understand things that not many others do. You might think there's something wrong with you, but its not wrong; it's right.

   You sit alone because the crowd has neglected you. You're different, and thus, you've been outcast. You sit on the sidelines of every activity or gathering, oftentimes staring longingly at the people who seem to be getting along just fine without you. You never think to join them because, well, what's the point? They don't notice you anyway. 

   You think thoughts like these.
   They don't need me.
   They're happy now, I would just ruin things.
   I wish I wasn't so awkward

   Loneliness is a constant state, but deep inside, you want to be loved. You want someone to notice you and make you feel important. You long for someone to care for you and listen to your soft voice. Because prior to contrary belief, you have a voice, and more importantly, you have things to say. Your mind is full of unexplored galaxies; endless space filled with thoughts and concepts and visions. You think, because there's no one else to talk to. You're an observer, and your mind is a constant clutter of past experiences and future hopes. But no one would ever know, because they always shut you out. 

   But I want you to know something.

   You are so much more than the jokes people make about you. You're beautiful. You are perfect just as you are. You don't need to speak loudly; simply speak as you feel the need to. Be patient with yourself. But please, dear Wallflower, don't sit back and watch life go by. Go be in the moment. Don't worry about who's watching you or saying whatever about you. Be yourself and don't try to be someone you're not, but let the world experience you. The world needs you. Don't deprive it of its chance. It's only chance. There is only one you and if you spend your whole life sitting on the sidelines, they'll never know how amazing you are.

   Never doubt yourself. You have a unique gift that no one else has. No one can love like you do, no one sees the world the way you do, no one is you except you. I know you sell yourself short; you think you're annoying or ugly or that your opinions aren't valid but I am here to say that they are. Never second guess yourself. 

   You are so very special. Don't fear rejection or criticism. Don't you worry about what people think of you.

   And most of all, thank you for existing. I see you standing alone and I smile with sympathy. I understand.

   I'm a wallflower too.

   I write this because no one ever told me it was okay. I always thought something was wrong with me because I felt things so deep and I hurt when other people hurt and I seemed to be the only one. No one told me it was okay to be shy or okay to feel alone sometimes or okay to listen to sad songs or take black and white photographs. In fact, they made me think those things were wrong. But they're not. They're human. They're okay.

   I want you to know that its okay to feel a lot. It's okay to be sad and sit by yourself and sing sad songs when you're alone and stay in your pajamas all day. Crying is not weakness and to be introverted is not a sickness. You are valid as a human even though you don't speak as much as the others. Please, accept yourself just as you are. Flaws and all. 

   Thank you for being a wallflower. The world needs more people who understand. 







10 comments:

  1. This was a really nice post. I liked it (:

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  2. Nice post, Faith! You're right, you should never sit on the sidelines because you're afraid -- there's nothing to be afraid of! After all, what can the world do to you? I have wallflower tendencies, but most of the time simply because I enjoying sitting back and "people watching." Since it occurred to me that it really was okay. :)

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  3. Sometimes I feel like a wallflower when I'm somewhere with nobody I know. This post is the sweetest most relatable thing for me in those moments. I do feel like I'd just ruin things and make things awkward. I'm insecure sometimes which is why I don't say anything to those I don't know. So thankyou for showing me there's more people like that out there, that it's sometimes okay to feel alone. Although, maybe speaking up is a good thing too. Lately I've learned that people are generally nice and once you talk they will love you. It all gets easier. But sometimes it's great to just observe everything too.

    Anyway, thanks for this lovely post.

    -M
    The Life of Little Me

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  4. This is amazing. We do need to show more love to the wallflowers, because the sociable are nothing without them. Some of the most amazing and most impactful people were/are wallflowers, and we don't tell them enough that they matter.

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  5. This is so true. I'm a wallflower too. When meeting new people, I'm never the one to speak first, and in elementary school "quiet" was always a part of describing me.

    Thank you so much for these beautiful words. :)

    hellostrawberrie.blogspot.com

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  6. This is amazing. A lot of people don't realize that the ones with the quietest minds are the ones with the loudest minds...wallflowers tend to be underestimated, and they truly are something special! xx

    Emily | Twenty-One Designs

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  7. You inspire me so much.. with this beautiful post!
    There's nothing wrong with being a wallflower..wallflowers aren't less beautiful than other flower out there.:)
    June
    The Journeys' of my beating heart

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  8. Thank you so much for the lovely comment! :) Your blog is very inspirational, by the way.
    Would you like to follow each other on GFC? Just tell me, and I'll immediately follow you back :)

    - Mel
    www.miielife.blogspot.com

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  9. This was such an amazing, inspiring post! Thank you so much for your beautiful words, Faith.

    I am quite the wallflower of our class, I suppose. I'm very quiet and don't speak very much, but I do have some friends. It's like... I'm always quiet, but when I am with only one or two people I turn into a party animal. Really weird, but in a way I like it...

    xox would you like to follow each other? Let me know! Cloudy Dreams

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    Replies
    1. Now following you! Thanks so much for your sweet comment, Faith! Can't wait for more of your posts!

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