Saturday, October 31, 2015

NaNoWriMo 2015

   Hey. So...uh...this is Jacob. I don't know if you know me. Did Faith talk about me yet? She probably didn't. I'm not really worth mentioning. Not too special or whatever. Anyways, I'm Jacob Dell. Technically I'm just a character in the mind of Princess Faith. I've been keeping her company since she was 11 or 12. We're pretty close I've seen her grow a lot over the past few years in so many ways; in specific, her writing has improved so much since I was created. And in turn, she's got to see transform before her very eyes. This year has been pretty crazy for me. Maybe I should tell you some stuff about me...well...I'm...average. I'm a senior in high school, I make good grades; I want to make it into a nice university so I can become a doctor, like my mom. My best friend's name is Kevin. And...I uhh...I have this really big crush on this girl at my school. You should see her, she's gorgeous and has this amazing long red hair that I pretend is natural but its clearly from a bottle and I've known her since middle school and I love her laugh and I'm not sure if she knows I exist...

   But...yeah...

   I hijacked this blog to tell you guys something. Faith probably won't be around much. The past few weeks have been...well, rough for her. If you ask her, she probably won't say anything, but she's really stressed. She loves school, but its really draining everything in her right now. She's having a horrible time understanding math, and I wish I could help her, because I'm really good at it, but I'm...you know. Then there's the play she's in. She lives for that, but so many changes have happened and she's having the hardest time remembering things; and she doesn't want to blame in on the lupus but its hard when last week she stared at the prop table and knew what she had to do, but found she couldn't make the connection between knowing which props were hers and bringing them onto the stage. Plus every time they get to rehearse the library scene she begins to choke. Completely out of the blue.

   It's just...she has a lot going on. The stress is pouring over into everything else; she hasn't been sleeping, she's been overeating, she's constantly overthinking...heck, her head is a mess. I know because I live there. Just...pray for her. Okay? I'm kind of worried about her.

   In other news, the reason she'll be MIA this month is. you guessed it, NaNoWriMo. (National Novel Writing Month.) I feel bad making her do this, because, like I said, I know how stressed she is. But I think this is really important. Sorry, that sounded self centered. But I really do think my story can change her. I know Ali's story changed her, and so did Azlyn's. My story...and Megan's story...it means something. Even if she can't see what yet.

   However, she will be posting updates on her blogs Facebook and definitely on Twitter. (Seriously, check the side panel for both those links.) She's pretty funny. But don't take it personally if she doesn't want to hang out or leave her house, and she might not have showered if you randomly stop by, and she'll probably gain 10 pounds from not moving, skipping the gym, and living off of microwave popcorn. But give her a break. She's having a rough time.

   As for me, I think Faith is gonna make me embark on a journey that I honestly didn't sign up for. I keep trying to make her tell me the plot but I don't think she knows it either. Should that make me worried? Eh. I trust her.

   Are there any other imaginary people out there? Come on, don't make me call out names. I know there are a lot of other stories about to be told. Comment your tales and stuff. I want to read them.

   I think Faith likes to put pictures at the end? She's taken some really great ones lately.

   Thanks for listening to me ramble. See you soon?

   -Jacob Dell

 








Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Beautiful Books!

 Ahh yes. NaNoWriMo prep season is upon us. And oh how it has taken me by surprise this year. Yikes. Honestly, I'm not sure I'll be able to win this year. But I don't want to have an attitude that says "If I can't win, why try?" So that being said, I know I can't win. But I love writing and I love my story, even if it's barely developed. See, my first year, I was a total panster. I had a vague idea and I ran with it. But since I've re-written Forlorn Hope, I've become a planner. 

   Writing and tackling NaNo plus college plus having 6 performances of columbinus all in the same month is probably going to kill me. Plus, ya know, social life, working out, reading my bible, and watching Parks And Rec. (Priorities.) I don't know. I've had so much time to think about it but I just...didn't. I'm sorry. 

   Anyhow! I'm super excited for this novel! And this November! I love the atmosphere of the season, especially since I started doing NaNoWriMo. I know I really should sit this one out, but I don't feel like it would be November without it. 

   Now, special thanks to Cait and Sky for this lovely link up. (Ps. if you're a writer you should do this too. Even if you're not doing NaNo.)


How did you come up with the idea for your novel, and how long have you had the idea?
    It actually came to me one day when I was like...11? When I was still a fetus in my writing "career." I was just practicing so I wrote up a seen and when I read what I had written I realized the tremendous backstory and I just fell in love. I realized that while yes, the original novel sucked eggs, I still adored the story and really, it was genius. It had been pounding on my heart again lately and I decided to revamp it as my NaNo!

1.     Why are you excited to write this novel?
Because the story is super crazy and I actually get to write a male protagonist and have it actually be a love story! Plus I think it hits on a lot of rough topics that need to be addressed.
2.     What is your novel about, and what is the title?
It's called In Secret. I don't have an official synopsis yet but basically it follows Jacob Dell, a senior in high school who, despite his strong Christian beliefs, has always been half in love with Megan Conner; the girl who is notorious for being, well, a slut. What he doesn't know is what happens to her behind closed doors. Megan is physically and sexually abused by her father and his friends, but keeps it all hidden away. When he finds her stumbling through the streets, half beaten, he has no choice but to help her get away. What he doesn't understand is that Megan isn't wanting to ever come back. Unexpectedly Jacob gets pulled into an adventure he never saw coming, with the girl of his dreams, who's a lot more broken than he ever could have imagined.
3.     Sum up your characters in one word each. (Feel free to add pictures!)
Jacob: Gentleman.
Megan: Broken.
Liza: Rebellious.
Kyle: Comic-relief (I can make it one word!)
4.     Which character(s) do you think will be your favourite to write? Tell us about them!
Jacob! Because he's a guy for once! Yeah, yeah I love feminism and all that but its been so long since I've read a nice book with a male protagonist. Plus I love the idea of him. He loves Megan, but his love has to be more about her needs than his wants. So to see him spend so much time with this girl and not, well, violate or disrespect her in any way is just amazing to me. I love that he's a gentleman.
5.     What is your protagonist’s goal, and what stands in the way?
Keep Megan safe but also bring her home. He wants her to go to the police, but she wants to go to California and forget all about her old life. So really, she's standing in his way. Megan and her stubborn attitude.
6.     Where is your novel set? (Show us pictures if you have them!)
Chicago and California. Plus everywhere in between.
7.     What is the most important relationship your character has?
God. God is everything to Jacob.
8.     How does your protagonist change by the end of the novel?
Ha. Spoilers.
9.     What themes are in your book? How do you want your readers to feel when the story is over?
Love and abuse. I want my reader to throw the book up against a wall and cry because its so beautiful. I want them to have a sense of what real love is; that it isn't sleeping with someone or kissing someone; it's having respect. It's putting their needs above your own.
10. BONUS! Tell us your 3 best pieces of advice for others trying to write a book in a month.
-Don't go in alone.
-Stock up on popcorn
-Don't forget how much you love to write.

   Are you doing NaNoWriMo? I want to hear about it! What's your story? I want to share more with you as it gets developed more and maybe even snippets as I begin to write it. Yay! 
   So you guys better hold me accountable this November about staying on top of crap and not spending so much time on Facebook. You hear me? I can do this...as long as I don't procrastinate. Woo!



   May the Force be with us writers.

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Beautiful


   Let me get you in on a little secret. 

   I've always been very insecure about how I look.

   Okay, so maybe not always. Ever since 8th grade I would say. I was always super skinny and then suddenly I wasn't, and people made comments even though it was normal and healthy. I had a hard time with it for a while. As a perfectionist, it's hard to accept when you're not what you consider to be "perfect." Once I got sick, it was even harder to accept myself and my new limitations. I couldn't exercise as much as I was used to, so along with comparing myself to every other girl around me, I would also compare who I was to who I used to be. Plus, the medication I was on for a while made my face really chubby and gave me bad acne. I knew people wouldn't understand it wasn't my fault and it made me really self conscious.


   On top of that, I used to be very shy. If you think I'm shy now, you don't know anything. I mean, I literally wouldn't talk. There were times I just didn't have anything to say, but when I was quiet I would be constantly beating myself up for not speaking. Plus I got nonstop crap from other people about how quiet I was. As if the worst thing int he world would be to not speak. I always felt that if I talked, I would sound stupid or say the wrong thing.

   Once upon a time I was an insecure mess. I cared way too much about what people thought of me and I held myself up to impossible standards. I compared myself to everyone around me. A lot of my insecurities came from a boy who broke my heart and left me to wonder why I wasn't good enough. Some came from my dad who spent years verbally abusing me. And really, a lot came from my perfectionist personality. But overall, it came from the fact that God had a purpose that was fulfilled even through the crappiest situations of my life. I am able to help and relate to people so much more now that I've experienced that.

I don't know how it happened but I changed. Obviously it was by God's grace because what happened for me was a miracle. I woke up and decided I didn't like the way I was living. I decided that I wanted to fall in love with life. And I did.

   I remembered how much I love fitness and healthy eating and how beautiful it is to be confident. I realized that I always wanted to be that fun girl who wore whatever she wanted and danced and laughed like a crazy women; and I would always says "Next year, I'll be her." And finally I said "This year."

   It took God breaking me for me to come to the point where I could be okay with who I was. And sometimes, I don't feel like I've changed at all. Sometimes I still feel anxious at parties, sometimes I still feel uncomfortable in shirts or dresses, sometimes I wish I could be someone else. That's okay. When that does happen, I just tell myself I'm okay and I will be okay. I know that the feeling will pass and I can get through it. 


   Now I find myself belting out songs at random, even though I used to never sing in front of people. If Mr. Brightsides comes on the radio you can bet I'll go in full 80's Music Video Mode. I don't care that I sometimes I scream during worship at church because I realized that that's how I worship and singing to my God is more important than how others see me. Now I'm not afraid to walk around in my Chewbacca onesie because I stopped caring about who thought I was weird. Maybe its not that noticeable to the people around me, and that's okay. I still get crap for being introverted and quiet, but that's only from ignorant people who don't know the fight I've endured to become who I am today.

   You can do it too. I wish I could give you that exact recipe to finding yourself, but there isn't one. It looks different for everyone. But it's worth it. I know sometimes it feels like you'll be broken forever, but that's only true if you make it. You don't have to be miserable. I know you're going to feel stuck and I know it seems so cliche and stupid; I never thought I would be writing a blog post as cheesy sounding as this one, trust me. But really, it's true. You are so beautiful, and some day you're going to believe me when I say that.


   So, I guess that's the short version. I have wanted to share that for a while but really, I've had no inspiration and honestly those thoughts didn't come out the way I wanted them to but there they are. Maybe in the future I'll discuss more in detail, because a million other topics stem from that one but really, this is the basics.

   You are beautiful.

   Not because of your size or how many likes your get on a selfie or the amount of times a day you get called beautiful. Being yourself and laughing and being confident, that's beautiful. You're beautiful because of your identity in Christ. Stop your intrusive thoughts when they come and counter them with truth. I have found that repeating "It's okay" to myself helps, although I can't tell you exactly why. Accept yourself. Flaws and all. 

   I love you, gorgeous. Stay strong.



   Also, I figured it was time you guys saw my face. So when I redesigned my blog, I added that picture. And now....well, here. Enjoy some shameless photos of me. I love you all. Seriously, you guys are stunning.