Friday, September 27, 2013

My Birthday!

Yesterday was my birthday!!! So to start off with here are some pictures that I got from my IPod. The first one is a picture that my sister made me. haha. The second one is my cake and the third one is a card I got from Becky from Thoughts From A Vintage Teen. (Check out her blog!)






   Sorry the pictures are so huge by the way. That what happens when I take them from my IPod. Ok, so for those of you that don't know, my friend/ministry partner, Diana, has a birthday the day before mine. So ever since we met 2 years ago we've been celebrating together. On the 25th she came over and we made rainbow cheesecake because she saw it on Tumblr and really wanted to make some. The pictures I have from that are really cool!

   






   We also spent most of the day watching the Magic School Bus with Becca from I Write...Monkeys... (Check out her blog too. She's gonna be an author one day! She gives great advice for writers.) It was a great day. The cheesecake tasted delicious! Then on the 26th, Diana came over again and we walked to my favorite store which is just a little vintage/resale toy store. They have Star Wars toys galore! They were selling vintage action figures for $3 a piece so I might go back today to buy some. My cousin, her son, and her fiance came over as well. It was my cousins birthday too so that was fun. Then she took me to get my nose pierced!!!!!! FINALLY!!! I only teared up a little bit but I didn't cry! I was really nervous because he just did it by hand, no special gun or equipment; just a guy shoving a needle through my nose. It feels a little tender now but I love it! It looks really pretty and I am very happy with my birthday present. And the customer service was really good at the tattoo parlor we went to.

   Now today I'm having some friends over and then I might go out with my aunt on Saturday. I can't believe I'm 17!!! AHHHH!!! I like it:)

   As far as future posting goes, I want to post some photography and random IPod pictures in the next few days. And I might do a 'My life according to Instagram' post. haha. Those should be fun.

   Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Clueless

I'm going to be 17 tomorrow. Yep. I'm old. Two days ago I spent my day looking at old pictures from Jr. High and even before that, and yesterday I hung around church during the Jr. High youth group. So I was having some major flashbacks from my Jr. High years. I looked at all the kids at group and I thought "No...I wasn't that young..." But I was. It didn't feel like it, but looking back on it now, I was 11! I remember thinking I was so old then and so mature. Ha. I see my two little siblings who are now at that age and they think they're so mature and old too and I laugh because I was the exact same way. I tried to tell them that they were still young but they insisted they were old. Oh well, they'll get it eventually.

   I was just thinking back on all the stuff I didn't know back in Jr. High. I didn't know how much my world would change in a few short years, I didn't know that fights with my best friend were temporary, I didn't know that I would eventually have to let go of the guy I liked oh so much, I didn't know that the things I cried over would be ok; nor did I know who I would be in high school or the plans God had for me. I had no clue. I was totally oblivious. Back in Jr. High I thought I was having the best years of my life, I thought that every day should be Tuesday because thats when my youth group was. I didn't know that I still had my whole life ahead of me.

   It reminds me the song Souvenirs by Switchfoot.

   "Here's to the twilight, here's to the memories, these are my souvenirs, my mental pictures of everything. Here's to the late nights, here's to the firelight, these are my souvenirs, my souvenirs. I close my eyes and go back in time. I can see you smiling you're so alive, we were so young, we had no fear. We were so young we had no idea that life was just happening."

   "Here's to your bright eyes, shining light fireflies. These are my souvenirs, the memory of a lifetime. We were wide eyed with everything, everything around us. We were enlightened by everything. Everything. I close my eyes and go back in time. You were just a child then and so was I. We were so young we had no fear. We were so young, we had no idea that nothing lasts forever."

   That song captures it just perfectly. That's exactly how I was. I had no idea. I was totally clueless. But in a way, that was a good thing. If I had known what God had in store for me beforehand, maybe I wouldn't be the person I am today. Tomorrow I turn 17 and for once I think I'm becoming who I want to be. After high school I'll probably blog these exact same lyrics and say that I had no idea where I was going and you know what? That's ok. That's more than ok. Because of how oblivious and young I was, I enjoyed life. I enjoyed every second of it all. It seems like it was just yesterday and also years ago at the exact same time. I loved it. I don't regret it; time flies to matter how much you cling to it. So don't be upset that you never "lived in the moment." Just live life and don't overthink it. Nothing lasts forever.

 
 My youth group winter retreat

 My sister and I

My close friend, Megan, and I.

   
   Nothing lasts forever but certain things can last a lifetime. The picture above is of my friend and I. We grew up together, or, we are growing up together. We're now in high school and we're still close. A lot of my friendships are like that and I love those very much. We share so many memories and I hold them very close and I can't wait to make more.


   I'm going to be 17. There's a picture of me the day I was born. (That cut on my cheek was supposed to go away. Yeah, it hasn't.) But its so weird to think that God knew everything about me on this day and before. He knew that I was His daughter. He knew all the hurt I would go through and all the drama and all the laughs. He had a book written for me of all the days of my life and as much as I want to write that book, I'm so glad He did. Because His plans are so much better. If someone had asked me back in Jr. High how I thought my life would be in 4 or 5 years, I would never have said any of this. And as much as I hate a lot of the junk I went through, I wouldn't be who I am today without it all. I never would have thought I would be someone from Columbia who would have a birthday the day before mine and we'd become best friends, I never would have thought my dad would leave us, I never would have pictured myself getting a blood disorder or even having a third sister. But on that day, September 26, 1996, God looked at me and He knew. I heard somewhere that when God looks at you He doesn't see you like you do, He sees you but He sees all of your potential. He sees who you could be. He accepts you as you are and knows who you can be. Its remarkable.

   So back in Jr. High when I thought I knew it all, I was really quite clueless. But God knew so that makes it all ok. So here's to many more years of unpredictable drama and trials, and blessings I never could have even thought to ask for.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Everybody Talks

If there is one thing I've learned thus far in my life I would say its this:

   Everybody talks.

   Ok so that was taken from the Neon Trees song with that exact title but seriously, that has been my motto for a while. It can help with so many different scenarios so its very convenient. But just think about that for a moment and let it sink in.

   Everybody talks. One line from that song is "Never thought I'd live to see the day when everybodies words got in the way." That's my favorite line because its so true. I think as people, we care far too much about what other people have to say and we don't care enough about what God has to say. Or what we have to say for that matter. So many people downgrade themselves and think so much lesser of themselves than they ought to, because they are so caught up in pleasing other people. Let me tell you a secret: you can't please them all. I've found that out the hard way. I've been trying to appease all of my peers and all the adults in my life and be this and be that and I'm done with it. Because the only opinion that actually matters is my own. My pastor used this quote from Augustine in his sermon the other day that really stuck with me. "Love God and do as you please." As long as you're obeying God and doing His will, who cares what other people think? I recently had a discussion with a good friend of mine in where I complained that no matter what I did, someone always had something to say about it. Once I pleased one person, someone else whined about it. So I move on to trying to please them and then the cycle just kept on going over and over again until I finally came to the realization that I didn't need to please them! What?! You mean you don't need to stress yourself out over the comments of other people?! Yes!


   I saw this picture on tumblr one day and it really stuck with me so I saved it on my IPod. I think its something I should keep in mind. I matter too. Yes, selflessness is a good thing, but it can become a bad thing when it begins to harm us. When you stop being yourself because too many people have complained about something, that's not good. Go be who you want to be. For my birthday next week I want to go get my nose pierced. Now, I've wanted piercings (tons of them!) since as long as I can remember. I've always loved punk rock style and have always wanted to be like that. (Too bad I'm too broke to afford it..) but I know someone who has their nose pierced and I didn't want people to think I was copying her seeing as we already have enough similarities as it is. But then I realized that I had the power to say 'Screw it' and do what I want and forget what other people think. They can think I'm being a copy, they can think I'm a freak, they can think whatever the heck they want, but its not going to change me. I'm adopting another motto for myself: 'Be Faith, not fake.' That means dressing how I want no matter how awful I look in the clothes, getting my hair cut how I want, acting how I want, and being myself. I wasn't meant to fit in to a mold but lately I've been letting myself be shoved into one. Because I grew up with most of my friends, they would be shocked to realize that in my head I'm actually some rock star wanna be with piercings and a wicked crazy sense of style. When I go shopping with my friends I'm always terrified to say "Oh I love that shirt!" or "That looks cool!" Because I don't want them judge me or think less of me if they disagree. But I don't want to do that anymore, I want to be who I want to be.

   Everybody talks.

   Another issue that this motto touches is gossip. Everybody does it. Everybody believes everything they hear and everybody always has something to say about everybody and you know what I have to say to that? "Eh. Everybody talks." I have heard so much garbage about so many of my friends and if I had the nerve to believe everything that everyone says, I would be a mess. There's one friend of mine in particular that everyone always seems to have an opinion about and I hear countless "Well Faith, did you hear about the time when they did ____" (Fill in the blank with whatever rumor you can think of. I've heard them all.) And I just want to punch someone in the face whenever they say something like that. Because really?! DO I LOOK LIKE I CARE?! NO! If I judged everyone by the stories people told me, boy would you guys be in trouble. Plus no one seems to remember the good things people do, only the bad. I've been learning to try and get to know people without letting the opinions of others interfere and guess what? I've made so many new friends! Turns out when you give people a fair shot and are open to learn about them, they are, in turn, willing to share more and be open and real. Wow. So whenever someone tries to tell me a story to get me to change my opinion on someone I just say "Well, everybody talks."

   Sorry that was more like a rant but it was something I felt like I needed to say. Its a great thing to keep in mind and also, just remember to not believe everything everyone tells you. Be yourself, don't be fake, and go live your life.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Dear My Future Boyfriend,

So I'm 16 now. I'll be 17 at the end of the month. When I was younger I had always imagined myself at this age. In my dream future self I had more piercings, a better sense of style, confidence, a drivers license, and a boyfriend. I have none of the above. But that's ok. Its all in God's timing and I've mentioned in previous posts that I'm working on becoming the person I've always wanted to be so hopefully I'll get most of those things I listed, but I can't control that last one. See, I've never dated anyone before. Ever. And I'm proud of myself for that. Because I'm not going to just give myself away to just anyone. Nope. You gotta fight for me. Because I know my worth in Christ and if you ain't willing to make sacrifices for me, sorry dude. So this is a letter to you, my future boyfriend. Here are some things you need to know.

   Hopefully you'll know without me having to say this but you need to ask my Mommerz or my older brother before you date me. That's just how it goes. I expect you to be a gentleman and to show me that chivalry isn't dead. Also, A Walk To Remember is one of my favorite movies so I expect you to take tips from Landon Carter. I want someone who will go above and beyond for me, to think outside the box. I love the little things: random acts of kindness and silly things and creative things. I don't want to have to tell you a lot of this stuff because I want you to know me well enough to know it already. I want you to take interest in the things I like and to love me for me, even on my worst days.

   In case you weren't aware, I date for marriage. Meaning if we date, I can see myself marrying you so you had better think about that and if you don't feel the same way then maybe we shouldn't be dating.

   But onto less serious things, I love pictures so lets take a ton of those. I really don't care what we do as long as I do them with you, so we can go wherever you like on dates. I will always try to listen to you and help you even when I don't understand. I'm working on making myself a Proverbs 31 woman but I'm not going to be perfect, I have my flaws, and you'll soon figure that out. But I care about you even when we fight. Another thing about me: I love cheesy romantic quotes and one liners. Beware. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart even though I try to hide it and that's gonna kill me one day. I also really love John Hughes films, especially Pretty In Pink because I think Duckie Dale is like, the best. (Take notes.) I get really jealous easily and I'm trying to work on that so please be patient. I'm also an overthinker and I cry for no apparent reason! Just so ya know. I'm also really bad at speaking and I'm shy but I like to push myself outside of my comfort zone. I have a slight obsession with Star Wars and if you don't think its the greatest thing in the world we need to breakup you had better be able to tolerate my love for it. And all my general geekiness for that matter. And the fact that I post my life on a blog that's gotten over 5,000 total pageviews.

   And most of all, I want to grow in Christ with you. I want to send you random bible verses and have bible studies and pray with you and worship with you. (by the way, its so freakin attractive when guys worship. Just sayin. Christian girl probs.) I want to be able to run to you and tell you all my God sightings and how He's speaking to me and when I'm confused about His calling for my life, I want you to help me figure it out. I want to tell you about all my prayer requests. And I want you to do the same for me. I want to hear all about the ways God is working in your life and all the crazy ideas you have to further the kingdom. I also plan on continuing this ministry of mine so you had better be prepared for that. And I wouldn't object if you wanted to help out...

   I want to be more than just "boyfriend and girlfriend." I want to be best friends. I want to be able to tell you anything and I want you to feel secure when you come to me. I want to do stupid and silly things together and just enjoy your company. Lets laugh together and tell each other lame jokes and laugh even when we mess up the punch line. Lets go on adventures!

   Now, you'll always be my best friend first and foremost but lets just be the cutest couple ever. lol. I'll wear your hoodies and I promise that when I look at you my face will always have the biggest smile on it. I could go on for days about fantasies of mine but I'd rather not. I want to love you more and more every day and I want you to love me the same way. But I also want you to pursue Christ. Pursue Him with every part of your being. Be a leader to me and show me new things and give me new perspectives. I don't mean to scare you but my dad left me and that left a gaping hole in my heart and it has me a bit worried for my own future, so you need to show me you can fight for me and love me alone. I am a prize and I don't give myself to just anybody.

   So there it is. But before I go I want to leave you with my favorite song and it always makes me cry. Its a love song of course. I don't know where you are or who you are or when we'll meet or how far away that future is, but I know that I'm so stinkin worried really excited for it all. I'd wait forever for you, but I would prefer not to. But all in God's timing right? So you keep working on becoming my prince and I'll get working on being a princess.

   Love,
      Your Future Girlfriend,
                           Princess Faith.


P.S my best friend has a list. That's all you need to know.

Monday, September 9, 2013

To Be A Hero

I've always wanted to be a hero.

   I've never been one to settle for mediocre; just living life and being a good person. I'm also a perfectionist. Go big or go home, and I've never been known as someone to give up and go home. So I strive and I strive hard. I'm constantly pushing myself and I'm never content with where I am because I want to be all that God has created me to be. Lately He's been teaching me about confidence and knowing who I am in Him. I can say boldly that I am a powerful person. How can I say that? Because I know that my power comes from the Holy Spirit in me, not by my own self. 2 Corinthians 10 taught me a lot about that.

   But that's straying from the point I want to make here. This week is Suicide Prevention Week and tomorrow is National Suicide Prevention Day. This is your chance to be a hero. How do you be a hero? Well, "heroes are made when we make a choice." (Hero, Superchick.) I asked my best friend how one goes about changing the world and her answer really stuck with me. She said "That's simple. One forgets his/her own wants and focuses on the needs of others." There's a choice you can make today to forget your wants and needs and look beyond yourself. I want to share my favorite part of the song I quoted earlier and I'll also share the lyric video on here because this is honestly one of my favorite songs and I want everyone in the world to hear it.

   "Little Mikey D was the one in class who every day got brutally harassed, this went on for years until he decided that never again would he shed another tear. So we walked through the door, grabbed the four-four out of his fathers dresser drawer and said 'I can't take life no more.' and like that a life could be lost. But this ain't even about that, all of us just sat back and watched it happen thinking 'its not our responsibility to solve a problem that isn't even about me.' This is our problem. This is just one of the daily scenarios which we choose to close our eyes instead of doing the right thing. When we make a choice to be the voice of those who won't speak up for themselves how many lives will be saved, changed, and rearranged? Now its our time to pick a side so don't keep walking by not wanting to intervene cause you just want to exist and never been seen. So lets wake up, change the world, our time is now."

   I hope you got the chills when you read that because I know I get them every time I hear that song. Because every line just sends a shiver up my spine. Especially at the part I underlined. See, we think the problem is Mikey, I mean, he was the one who went to kill himself right? Wrong. Our problem is the fact he was bullied and no one did anything about it. Words can kill. James 3 describes the tongue as a "restless evil full of deadly poison." We gotta learn how to watch what we say. We may not even realize that we're hurting someone else, so we need to be very conscious of our words and actions.

   One of my favorite movies has always been Hangmans Curse. Its not a big popular movie but it never fails to make me cry and I could recommend it to everyone. The entire movie you can just see how much pain these teenagers are in and at one point in the movie a kid tries to hang himself. I could go on a tangent about that movie but what I mean to say is that suicide is real. I've met a few people who have attempted it before and I know I'm thinking of them a ton this week and as I write this blog post I'm also writing letters and sending Facebook messages to those people to tell them how glad I am that they're in my life. They inspire me. When people have told me that they've tried taking their own life they always say that they hope I don't look down on them now but in fact, its the opposite. I really look up to those people. Because they've been in awful situations and have still pressed on even when they almost gave up. To be so close and still overcome it...that's a tremendous amount of strength.
   But the thing I want you guys to do now is to go out and make a difference. Go be a hero and stop waiting for someone else to step up, because this is your problem too. You may not think you know someone who is struggling but I didn't think I did either and boy was I mistaken. Treat everyone with love and respect because you never know who may need a kind word; and one simple kind word can save a life.


   And to all those who have/are struggling with suicide, I love you. God loves you. There is only one you in the entire world and you cannot be replaced. You are stronger than this. You are not alone.
Suicide Hotline - 1-800-784-2433

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Alopecia And Childhood Cancer Awareness Month

You probably assumed from the title but I just wanted to say it again, September is alopecia and childhood cancer awareness month! You all know what cancer is and most of you will know that there was a boy that I admired very much of passed away this year from it. Since hearing Silas' story I've been trying to help raise awareness for childhood cancer and supporting other kids who struggle with it. But I don't how many of you know what alopecia is. Its an autoimmune disease where your immune system thinks your hair follicles are foreign, so it attacks them. I am all for helping raise awareness for this because I also have an autoimmune disease, ITP, and I know how much they suck.

   So the real question is.....What can we do?

   Well I'm going to give you some ways that you can raise awareness for each of these! Here is a list of things for childhood cancer: 
  • Wear lots of gold! Gold is the color for childhood cancer. I've got my nails painted all gold and you should too. Gold goes with anything, so just and a dash of it to whatever you're wearing.
  • Go and Like Silas' Facebook! His mom, Jessica, runs the page and since her sons passing she has used it to help other kids with cancer! So go and support her by clicking This Link!
  • Donate. Donate toys to a children's hospital or money to a cancer foundation.
   Honestly I don't know many ways to help to raise awareness for alopecia because I myself have just been introduced to the knowledge of it so I'm still really unsure. But allow me to direct you to someone who can give you information. Head over to Facebook and Like Shine On With The Bald Princess. Its run by a very lovely princess who I've gotten to honor of talking to. She has alopecia areata and she uses her Facebook as a way to not only raise awareness but also to help people see what beauty really is. Also, press THIS LINK to head to the National Alopecia Areata Foundation website. Also, the color to wear for this is blue! So I would suggest just make a blue and gold outfit :)

   Now, here are a few things that the lovely bald princess would like you guys to know about alopecia:

   "Alopecia is an auto-immune disease that is not life threatening but it is life altering, so while I am not dying and most of the world views hair as merely cosmetic....I HAVE A REAL DISEASE THAT DESERVES REAL ATTENTION, RESEARCH AND A CHANCE FOR A CURE. not because I am unhappy or not confident in who I am without hair but because I would like to have a healthy and fully functioning body just like others out there."

   "You probably think that okay so you have no hair just wear a wig, or a hat or something just get over it, but honestly what I want you to know today about alopecia is that it is much more complex and affects us psychologically more then most would realize, and that there are alot of emotions that play into whether to wear a wig or not and how comfortable one is with these options that everyone just throws at us and tells us to just accept like it is no big deal... NEWS FLASH TO US IT IS A BIG DEAL!"

   
   So there it is! Wear gold and blue and go out and support childhood cancer and alopecia!