I'M BACK HOME!!!
In case you missed the announcement...I was taken to the hospital Thursday night and I just got back today! I've been having a ton of pain, fatigue, fever bursts, weakness, and swelling. Basically I was falling apart, and for a whole month I dealt with these symptoms. I went to the doctor and got blood work done and my doctor said that if my temperature ever got over 100 then I should go to the ER. Of course, on Thursday night it did. I had also been feeling dizzy that night. So we went in and sure enough, I was admitted. As for all the technical stuff, I had to have a CT scan, a chest X-Ray, 2 EKG's, an IV in my right arm, and over 20 vials of blood taken. This was my first overnight stay at a hospital and I ended up staying for four nights. I haven't gotten an official diagnosis but they're pretty sure its lupus. I'm on medicines to reduce the swelling and stiffness I've been having and so far it's been working. I've got more appointments scheduled so I can keep y'all updated on that.
I loved the hospital actually. I got to stay in the Ronald McDonald house. I always thought I was a kid at heart, but now I'm sure of it. Just ask my mom about how my eyes lit up when I was taken onto the pediatric floor where they had colorful walls and my room was themed like a zoo. Or my friends can tell you about when they visited me and I showed them the playroom where we got to color pictures and the ceiling was painted like the sky. I'm sure my nurses thought I was crazy. I make funny noises and smile a lot and always ordered chocolate milk with every meal. But I was blessed with an incredible hospital staff. Everyone was so nice to me. One nurse took notice of the fact that my mom kept buying me Pepsi from the machine down the hall, so when she came back later she brought me two baby cans; and she continued to do so every night I was there. Another nurse went to get my mom coffee from the nurses station because they ran out in the room, and my mom had mentioned I only liked mine with creamer; something they didn't have...out in the public room. They had some back in the nurses station so she brought me a cup. But one of my favorite things was hearing a nurse pray over all the patients in the hospital via the intercom.
Being in the hospital, I had a lot of time on my hands. I tweeted and posted on Facebook obsessively, watched way too much Say Yes To The Dress, read the entire book of Job (and 1 Peter and James.) read all of Looking For Alaska in one day, wrote an essay that I'll be posting on the RAIM site, wrote a chapter of a short story, and read half of The Two Towers. Also the list of movies I watched is as follows: Pretty In Pink, X-Men 2, The Princess Diaries 2, The Pirates Of The Caribbean 2, The Sandlot, and Wolverine. I didn't have access to a computer until this morning so I wasn't able to blog and I missed you guys; but I was active on the rest of my social medias.
Basically that has been my life this week. I had some friends visit me and bring me things and draw pictures for me. Also my mom stayed with me the entire time and I am so thankful for that. Not once did we try to kill each other; it was actually a great bonding experience. I was able to hog her all to myself on Mother's Day which was fun.
Now onto the deep spiritual things I learned/are learning. Because I can't go somewhere without it being a spiritual journey. I loved being there because it was so quiet. In a house full of 9 kids plus my "adopted sister" and her husband and child, we have a crazy hectic house. But here it was quiet. I was at rest; and I was able to hear from God. On Saturday night around midnight I cracked open my bible while my mom was asleep and was able to pray and ask God to show me what He wants me to learn. I have been praying all week for spiritual ammunition to use against the enemy come June. See, my best friend is going away for 6 months. My best friend and ministry partner. Running a ministry is hard; and its even harder doing it with someone who will be on the other side of the world. But this week I had an epiphany, which I'll blog about next time, and thus the praying began. And God was faithful and each time I prayed, no matter what specific thing I prayed for, He showed it to me. I prayed for something on fear, I opened my bible and bam! something on fear. I prayed for something on brokenness, I got it. And over my stay at the hospital I just asked for whatever He wanted me to hear.
I ended up learning about suffering. I started reading Job for no apparent reason and it spoke to me a lot. Which is weird because I have read that book before and I didn't like it. Next to that I also read Looking For Alaska by John Green. I spent a good portion of my time this weekend thinking over questions from that book. And then God tied the themes from Job with the things in the book and then those things in with what I've been learning since last Sunday! So all these random pieces finally came together! Sorry that's really vague, but I want to save some things for the next post. This is mostly just updates and what not.
Anyways, I'm half awake right now and my bed is calling me. (I've missed it so much.) I'm sorry if this post made no sense. I'll write on more specific thoughts later in the week. Thank you for everything! Also keep praying for me as I have more doctors appointments and I'm on meds which have side effects and all that fun stuff. Right now I'm really praying for a definite diagnosis and that the pain will stay away like it has been. I've really been feeling very loved this week and I've gotten so many encouraging messages and texts and they make me all teary eyed. So thank you all so so much. God is so good<3 p="">3>